mythwoven:

Either propose to me in a fog-covered field at dawn after your most disagreeable aunt has barged into my family’s estate in the middle of the night to very loudly express her poor opinion of me, and to put to rest the wild rumors of our engagement or dont even bother

dearlesbian:

on every level except physical this is me

iskinaary:

ask-link-the-hylian-champion:

iskinaary:

watching spiderverse makes me never wanna see another live action movie ever again like. why did we ever start making comic books into live action movies?? make it animated to explore the art form instead of trying to make it hyper realistic you fucking cowards

Okay but have you just concidered

Robert Downey Jr.

i have and i don’t care about him

classycarolinagirl:

grumpysalmon:

shout out to water for keeping my throat sufficiently lubricated for optimal yodeling techniques

That literally got weirder and weirder with every word

papasmoke:

papasmoke:

papasmoke:

Oojka wamma po Jen'kiwi. Biig Woopa slemmy dengo peet

His most mighty Exaltedness would like to request that you fetch him a mint condition DVD of the beloved Earth film; Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore, failure to do so will result in a fate… worse than death.

newdoges:

lesbianendor:

The only truly good games are:

Stardew Valley

Skyrim

Breath of the Wild

because you can interact with dogs AND make soup. If you can’t interact with dogs and make soup your game is bad. Sorry assassin’s creed odyssey that’s just the truth. Someone pay me to write this listicle.

vampireapologist:

vampireapologist:

vampireapologist:

vampireapologist:

Concept: dark web grabbag. Like a loot crate that comes with a random assortment of stuff you can buy on the dark web with monthly themes. Illegal contraband unboxing videos.

I hear these already exist and people do unboxings on Youtube but so far None of them, Absolutely Zero (0) of them have just been completely full of Extremely Illegal and Invasive Giant African Land Snails and that’s really disappointing.

February will be Contraband Wildlife month, and everyone will just get 1,000 freshly hatched Giant African Land Snail babies in their box.

It’s important that they present the snails like a makeup vlogger

benepla:

- the mcelroys and james charles get in a legal battle becaue james charles does a video where he plays d&d for the first time with some other beauty gurus and he just so happens to play as a flamboyantly gay elf named Taco. james charles wins because he honestly doesnt know what the adventure zone is he was just playing as himself and named the character taco because he thought it’d be like lolrandom. it humiliates everyone involved

- i dont have any other i just had this thought. it struck me much in the way christ struck joan of arc

timetravelonion:

I dont know what to say. I’m at a ,’ , |,’_’ for words